WALKING WITH JESUS MINISTRIES
'GROWING BELIEVERS INTO DISCIPLES, UNITED
IN CHRIST, REFLECTING JESUS TO THE WORLD'
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375. The Microschlock Bible
(A parody. Adapted by Bellgamin) Customer: Oh salesclerk, could you help me please?
Clerk: Hi, my name is Velma and I'll be your Support. What's your problem?
Customer: The book of Psalms is missing from this Bible I bought here yesterday.
Clerk: Try looking again. Maybe Psalms will be there this time.
Customer: No, it's still missing.
Clerk: Maybe it's the way you're using the Bible. Try opening it from the back instead of the front.
Customer: Even when I open it from the back, Psalms is still missing.
Clerk: Maybe the Bible is incompatible with your eyeglasses. Did you wear READING glasses while you used this Bible?
Customer: I don't need glasses. My eyesight is perfect.
Clerk: Hmmm...if you say so. Well, it might be a configuration problem. How was the Bible set up?
Customer: They just handed it to me in a cardboard box. What has that got to do with the fact that Psalms is missing?
Clerk: Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the book of Psalms was missing?
Customer: I took it out of the box, of course!
Clerk: Oh oh! That could be the cause of your problem. Anyway, that Bible is rather out-dated technology. Have you considered upgrading to our most recent version?
Customer: You folks have updated the Bible?
Clerk: Certainly. We just issued Bible-98, version 2.1. It comes with 100 free hours on the internet, plus one full year of Tech Support.
Customer: Okay, bring me Bible-98. I'm running late now.
Clerk: Here you are sir. Bible-98, the latest thing.
Clerk starts to leave.
Customer: (Examines Bible) Hey, wait a minute! What are all these extra pages glued in between the Bible pages? I didn't ask for those.
Clerk: No problem sir. They can be removed for a slight extra cost. Of course, doing so will void the warranty and your Bible might not function properly without them.
(And so it goes. Er..... did anybody say McWindoze?) |
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