Top Ten Things People Won't Say When They See the Christian Bumper Sticker or the more Subtle Fish Symbol On Your Car:

10. "Look! Let's stop that car and ask those folks how we can become Christians."

9. "Don't worry, Billy, those people are Christians - they must have a good reason for driving 90 miles an hour."

8. "What a joy to be sharing the highway with another car of Spirit-filled brothers and sisters."

7. "Isn't it wonderful how God blessed that Christian couple with a brand-new BMW?"

6. "Dad, how come people who drive like that don't get thrown in jail?" "Dad, can we get a bumper sticker like that, too?"

5. "Stay clear of those folks, Martha. If they get raptured, that car's gonna be all over the road!"

4. "Oh, look! That Christian woman is getting a chance to share Jesus with a police officer."

3. "No, that's not garbage coming out of their windows, Bert - it's probably gospel tracts for the road workers."

2. "Oh, boy, we're in trouble now! We just rear-ended one of God's cars."

1. "Quick, Alice, honk the horn or they won't know that we love Jesus!"